Growing up being in an unorganized room was enough to put me in a mood. The sound of other people chewing, the crunch of a plastic bag, or the loud noise of a motorcycle drove me crazy.
I thought it was just a mania as everyone told me the same thing, that I was too sensitive and picky. Today we call that a highly sensitive person, people who feel more deeply than the rest.
Being a highly sensitive person (HSP) can make you feel different. However, being very sensitive is not a disorder, it is a personality trait. This is not something to try or change; but to better understand and thrive on. Being an HSP is exactly what it sounds like: being ultra-sensitive to sensory input, people, and the environment, but there’s more to discover
Problems of being a highly sensitive person

Hard to fit in
The feeling that we don’t belong can often start within our own family; we feel “different” from them, not only in terms of how we think and act, but also in how we see the world.
Many HSPs spend their childhood adjusting, trying to be like those around them in an attempt to fit in.
We are over-analyzers by nature
Highly sensitive people notice little things that others miss. A lot of little things, especially when it comes to the body language of other people. They notice when someone’s tone of voice doesn’t match their words; when someone doesn’t look them in the eye when answering a question. And they may later become distressed by the interaction, especially if they suspect the other person wasn’t completely honest or, worse yet, is upset with them.
Even though it can sometimes be a cognitive fallacy, they are often right.
We can easily stress
HSPs generally try to stay away from overwhelming stimuli or stressful situations, such as conflict or confrontation. This at the same time can make relationships more complex than what they are. Sometimes it can lead to codependency due to the constant attempt to keep things peaceful and limit self-expression.
- Ask yourself which emotions you have been holding back.
- Schedule breaks throughout the day to rest and feel grounded.
- Prioritize self-care. For example, once a week, usually on Sundays, I save about three hours for self-reflection; I write in a journal my feelings about the week, my goals and concerns.
Highly Sensitive People hate rushing
Nobody likes to rush; it makes us careless and it creates stress. But for very sensitive people, time pressure can cause greater anxiety. Having to do something fast, like ticking off thousands of things on a to-do list, or simply being late for an appointment, can leave HSPs quite nervous.
It’s hard for us to say no
As highly sensitive people we are very empathetic and aware of the feelings of others, we do not want to let anyone down. Although it may not seem like a disadvantage at first, sensitive people can fall into the trap of people-pleasing, committing too quickly, or accepting an invitation even when they don’t really feel like it.
Recommended reading: How to say no and avoid being taken advantage of
- Practice setting limits. Identify first what limits you need and be aware of them. Then, communicate your limits to whoever needs to hear them. Remember that their reaction is not your responsibility.
We don’t socialize like most people do
For many people, going to a bar, party, or hanging out with a large group of people is what they do for fun. But for HSPs, spending an extended period of time in a noisy, crowded environment can be too overwhelming. This can make it harder for you to socialize and make new friends in your youth.
- Instead of being passive and letting others plan things for you and do things you don’t feel like doing, start being proactive. This may mean planning a meeting with friends in a place where it’s quieter or where you know you’ll be comfortable. In my case I noticed that I complained about the plans my friends made but never proposed anything myself.
HSPs can have low self-esteem
Some HSPs struggle with low self-esteem, lack of confidence, or feelings of not being good enough. This most often happens if your sensitive nature has been criticized or judged from a young age, if you grew up as a very sensitive child, causing you to feel ashamed or judged for it.
As a result, many tend to be people-pleasers and/or “fix” or rescue others, which can often be an unconscious drive to try to meet their own needs.
We take time to make decisions
Those who are very conscientious in the way they make decisions may take longer to reach a decision. Most likely this is due to the above; they are weighing their emotions with logic.
As highly sensitive people we tend to be intuitive, because of this we can get very upset if they make a bad decision. We always take into account the opportunity cost of an action.
Unbalanced relationships
Highly sensitive people’s relationships are often out of balance. By nature we are people who like everyone to be comfortable and are good at listening to the problems of others. But we don’t want to “bother” others with our own problems, which leads to one-sided relationships.
When it comes to romantic relationships, many HSPs tend to try to shut down their feelings and wear a “mask” to hide who they really are for fear of being judged as “too emotional”. As such, their partners are often unable to meet (or even know) their true emotional needs.
That mask can leave them with partners they don’t feel a true connection with, or even in codependent relationships with needy, addicted, or narcissistic partners, situations where there’s no room to meet their own emotional needs.
We are our biggest critic
Every little mistake, every criticism, and every awkward interaction has the potential to linger in a highly sensitive person’s head for days, even years. You can relate? HSPs often struggle with overthinking, feeling like an impostor, and feeling like they’re always doing something wrong.
- Practice techniques to control anxiety, such as reframing thoughts, mindfulness exercises, and affirmations.
- Talk to a mental health professional if your inner critic is overwhelming and affecting your daily life.
More likely to be depressed or anxious
One of the biggest downsides to being highly sensitive is the increased likelihood of being predisposed to anxiety and depression. Although these can also be hereditary, feeling things deeper and stronger than others means that these disorders are more likely to occur. If you feel like you are suffering from either, make sure you talk to someone and seek professional advice.
Interesting facts about PAS
- 30% of highly sensitive people are introverts
- The PAS trait is found in 15 to 20% of the population.
- In some cultures, HSPs are more valued. In cultures where it is not valued, HSPs tend to have low self-esteem
- HSPs are prone to high-functioning anxiety
- Is not a disorder, it is a personality trait
- HSPs are more prone to asthma, eczema, and allergies.
Let me know in the comments if you can relate with these problems! In another post we will see what are the benefits of being a highly sensitive person and how to get the most out of it (not everything is bad)😎
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- Research shows HSPs react worse to criticsNo one likes to hear critics or negative comments about our actions. We feel judged and scrutinized and it’s easy to fall into the “you’re not valued enough” mentality. And the worst thing is that criticism is everywhere, at work, in your social circle, even on the networks. We cannot escape it, nor should we.… Read more: Research shows HSPs react worse to critics
- Differences between being an introvert and a HSPThis blog is dedicated to introverts, highly sensitive people and people with social anxiety, but is it the same thing? In case you don’t know, I’ll tell you in advance, it’s not the same but neither are they exclusive or contradictory terms. The truth is that I am an HSP, an introvert and I have… Read more: Differences between being an introvert and a HSP
- Signs that you are a Highly Sensitive PersonDo you quickly notice how a person feels? Have you been told that you are very empathetic? you may be a highly sensitive person. One of the characteristics of highly sensitive people is that they are very affected by social stimuli, such as the voices and facial expressions of other people. Thus, a highly sensitive… Read more: Signs that you are a Highly Sensitive Person
- Open offices: a hell for introverts and HSPs?It was the third that Tom got up to go to the bathroom, what the hell was this man drinking? In front of me, my other coworker, who seemed to be typing at a thousand miles per hour… or was I typing too slowly? In the background, but still too close, my boss was talking… Read more: Open offices: a hell for introverts and HSPs?
- Disadvantages of being a Highly Sensitive PersonGrowing up being in an unorganized room was enough to put me in a mood. The sound of other people chewing, the crunch of a plastic bag, or the loud noise of a motorcycle drove me crazy. I thought it was just a mania as everyone told me the same thing, that I was too… Read more: Disadvantages of being a Highly Sensitive Person
One of the biggest disadvantages of being an HSP is the overwhelming emotional burden that comes with it. Imagine feeling everything more intensely than others, from joy to sadness, to fear and anxiety, and not being able to control it. This can lead to emotional exhaustion, burnout, and even physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, and insomnia. I once had a partner who was an HSP, and I saw firsthand how challenging it can be. He would get easily overwhelmed by noises, crowds, and even strong smells. He would need plenty of alone time to recharge and would often feel drained after spending time with people. It was difficult for him to navigate social situations, and he would often feel misunderstood and isolated. However, with the right support and understanding, he was able to learn coping strategies and thrive in his own way.